I’m Not Above Bribing My Kids

*Groan* Tomorrow is portrait day… Wildman just turned 3 and Cutie Pie turns 1 on Friday. Have I mentioned how much I hate portrait day? It suuuuuuuucks. In fact, I’ve never taken both rug rats to a photo session solo. Having a good back up was a requirement when Wildman was younger. He’d inevitably try to shimmy up the hanging backdrops, ransack the props, or simply take off while I was preparing Cutie Pie for his camera time. Even though I do have standard issue eyes-in-the-back-of-my-head, I do not have a clone to chase down and restrain Wildman. Hence the need for a good back up. Usually, I drag J along with me or my mom or my MIL.

Tomorrow I’m going to be a big girl and go it alone. Wish me luck.

At 3, Wildman is at a ripe old age. He’s mellowed quite a bit. Instead of freaking out and melting into a sobbing mass on the floor at the sight of the dark cave of a photo studio, he now enters the room and hangs out. I can reason with him at this age. In the past I’d just leave. It wasn’t worth my time, energy, or frustration. Bribery works now too. “If you listen to Mommy, sit for your picture and smile nicely, I’ll give you a lollipop.” Wildman is all about the prospect of candy these days. So, I think he’ll behave tomorrow.

Cutie Pie has always been good for pictures. That’s because he wasn’t crawling until a couple of months ago… When the kid can’t move he’s pretty easy to work with. Now, I’m not sure how he’s going to do… If he doesn’t crawl off the little fabric covered platform to his death it will be a good session.

When I called to make the appointment the lady informed me that she always likes to take a group photo with the parent so I should dress accordingly. What?! Why? I just want a photo of Wildman at three-years-old, a photo of Cutie Pie at one-year-old and maybe a photo of them together for Valentine’s Day. Get in, get out. I don’t want to be in a picture. But then I was thinking what if they don’t want to sit still for the group photo? What if I have to get in there to settle them down? Ugh. Great.

You know, I don’t even have a real plan for what the boys are going to wear. Cutie Pie has an adorable first birthday shirt so he’s covered. I can probably rummage through the closet for a cute polo shirt for Wildman to wear for his photo. But I don’t have a darn thing for them to wear for their group picture. I suppose they should match. Which means I need to find something for me to wear to match them. I feel a shopping trip coming on. Red shirts and jeans for Valentine’s Day? That’s the direction I’m considering.

I sound like such a whiner today. I know, I know! I’m PMS-ing and I need some chocolate STAT! I’ll take some deep cleansing breaths and try not to chew anyone’s head off today. 😉

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